Monday, February 7, 2011

Lessons Learned

I really want Cameron to have a new job. I yearn for a job and each time he applies for a job I imagine what it would be like to have the job. I imagine him going to it and what he would be doing and whether he would like it or not. I imagine the paycheck. I imagine what I would do with the paycheck. I imagine where we would live. (He has applied to jobs in all sorts of different states.) I imagine what we would do there. I think of the ways I could use the money in a better way than we used it before based on what I have learned while waiting for a job.

Waiting for a job to come along has been tiring. Cameron was called as Elder's Quorum President yesterday. That is the 3rd Stake Calling in a six month period. He has accepted all them because we need blessings (and because he was asked to do it). I spoke with a friend and said there is only one blessing that I want. Cameron to find a job to support us. We talked about the lessons learned and what I still may need to learn now.

I have learned a really important lesson about money. Don't spend as much as you have ever. In the past 5 months of unemployment I have learned that saving 10% of your money is very important because you never know when you might need it and you might as well take care of yourselves first. We accomplished a very important landmark in our savings account yesterday.

I have learned to pay my tithing religiously. I have always paid it but now it is the first thing out of the account and I feel proud to hand over the money I feel I can't live without. I also have learned to pay a fast offering. The fast offering is more for us than it is for anyone who might need it.

I have learned to attend the temple. I have made it a goal to go monthly and to enjoy being there. I appreciate the learning and growing I can do there. I appreciate the chance to learn with my husband.

I have learned to pray.

I have learned that Heavenly Father can provide for you even when you think it might be impossible. I have learned that blessings can come in many different ways.

I have learned that unemployment checks come whenever they want. On time, two weeks late, or not at all. You just have to accept that fact and deal with it. Even when our checks are very late we have never gone hungry.

I have learned that lots of people care and help out in all sorts of little ways. (Cameron has found fences to build, rooms to paint, and other things to build to help out.) Thanks to our ward members for helping out.

I have learned that there are a lot of worse things out there than being unemployed. I am grateful for our mostly healthy bodies, for the chance we have to be together as a family. I am thankful for my trials and glad that I am not experiencing anyone else's trials right now.

I guess the lesson I still need to learn is to be completely happy with what I have. Or to be happy despite what I don't have. I still want more. I am not sure how to force myself to learn this lesson. I want what we don't have and I think I should want it since if I don't we would be accepting a life of living off unemployment. I guess the lesson to learn is to really want something but be content to wait until the Lord sees fit to give it to you. I hope I can learn this lesson soon.


Jesse said...

Amazing perspective. I am so impressed at how you endure this. It is inspiring! You guys are doing all the right and important things. For all it's worth, my prayers are being sent your way...

Mama Bean said...

You are AWESOME!!! You are my hero and I could only hope to have the same perspective as you if I ever have to cross the same bridge. We must get together for a day at the beach when we come in the fall.