When I went to the Especially for Youth (EFY) program at BYU in summer of 1996, I never imagined I was going to meet that one hot lady I would eventually marry. Indeed had I thought I would meet my future wife, I might have paid more attention to the details so that I could write about it all for our 10-year anniversary. I intended to go more as ‘something to do’ during an otherwise unproductive time of the year. Having set a pattern for a natural attraction to blondes, it was fitting that Jim Arciniega and I found ourselves flirting (of course, by my lead) with the pair of blonde friends in our assigned group at EFY. Earlier in the day we had all met and participated in some activities, but at the first dance on Monday night, Jim and I mostly found ourselves mingling with the two blondes. Since the feeling appeared to be a two-way street, we didn’t see any reason to abandon ship.
While I don’t remember all the details, I recall dancing with Ina first, and several times. Eventually Ina and I caught up with Melissa and Jim, and we changed up on dancing partners. As I danced with Melissa I enjoyed her conversation; I learned where she lived, what she liked, and very soon found out that she was talented, had direction in life, passion for living, and ambition to succeed. Again, I had no reason to abandon ship.
As the week wore on, Jim, Ina, Melissa, and I spent more time together as a group than not. We attended classes, meals, and games together. I grew impressed by her spiritual convictions; they weren’t drastically deep (from a philosophical sense), but they were firmly rooted; absolute. I had never really known someone of my own age (at that time) to feel so strongly, or at least it had never been made known to me. Nonetheless , Melissa exemplified characteristics I found attractive both inside and out. Wheeww..that’s hot. I really didn’t see the need to abandon ship, even as the week was drawing to a close.
I learned that Melissa’s birthday was that same week (Thursday or Friday??). The year before at EFY, I remembered the “bookstore” as being a place to buy just about anything, so I headed there in search of some simple gift. As full as the place was, I wasn’t finding anything that really was a gift for Melissa, at least in my mind. Then I spotted a framed picture of Christ hugging a common man, either welcoming him to the splendor of salvation, or forgiving the man’s sins, or maybe both. I’m not sure, but I do know that Melissa had stated that she liked that picture; so there it was. I also wrote a note to give to her. At this point, I can’t remember even actually giving it to her, other than that she was a little surprised, but the smile told me that she was on board.
On Friday, there was the last and final dance which is a bit more formal with dressed up standards, a nice dinner preceding, and an air of farewell. Putting off the inevitable, I (and most other EFY participants) resolved to make the evening its best. I didn’t really have any thought of some “future” or longevity with Melissa; I did know that she was fun, attractive, and a good flirt, so I followed my life’s philosophy of “let’s just see what happens.” So we enjoyed the night while we boogied, talked, flirted, and slow danced.
Saturday morning rolled around and, after a night of very little sleep (hundreds of teenagers feeling high on life calling their buddies all across the BYU campus doesn’t allow much sleep, especially since I was one of them) I had much stress while I packed up my stuff in a hurry. I called Melissa one last time and asked her to meet me so that we could say our goodbyes. We met in front of the dorms where everyone gets picked up to go home. We had a pointless and meaningless conversation before mustering a farewell statement, and out of nowhere I gave her a kiss on her cheek (on her cheek?). Well, I’m sure that was fine with her. In retrospect, I’m not sure why I stopped there, but as it turned out there have been plenty of opportunities to amend that awkwardness.
Melissa’s mom (?) was first to show up and Ina and Melissa disappeared into the hectic crowd of cars. Jim and I talked about the week, the remainder of summer, and the long drive to Running Springs until my mom showed up to pick us up.
Ahh, yes, the note with her birthday gift; I don’t remember word-for-word, but I think I stated to her that I liked her and that she is a good example. I wanted to say more, but trying to be realistic, I left it at that.
A few days after returning home, I was remembering the good times still present in my mind. I wanted to call Melissa and say hi, but I had to research her phone number. It seemed that the directory given to me at EFY had a wrong number in it. If you know me, you know I like to find solutions to problems. Finding through the phone services that Putnams were far more numerous than Jensons in the City of Sandy, UT, I filtered through the Jensons first until I found Ina’s number. From Ina I got Mellissa’s number. The rest is pretty much history.
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